Do you prefer a trash bag with ot without a draw string?

Sunday, March 9, 2014

Chasing Windmills

Quixotic- foolishly impractical especially in the pursuit of ideals : marked by rash lofty romantic ideas........ 

Quixotic is a term derived from the name of the title character in Miguel de'Cervantes' book Don Quixote de la Mancha. The term had rested dormant in my mind until recently when I stumbled upon it while viewing a friend's profile on a website. I don't think that there is a better term that more aptly applies to victims of romantic scams and cyber love. I think I can safely say that many of us know of people or have been ourselves a member of one or both groups. 

Group One: 

You're 40-70 years old, you've no job, you're living with a relative, and " Big Yank" is stitched across your preferred brand of apparel. An onliner with supermodel looks approaches you stating that he/she is looking for true love and your profile has caught his/her attention. And why not, you're a helluva catch, eh? You're beating them away from the front door with a stick, correct? Your phone is ringing so much that you can no longer return all the calls, right? Of course the answer to all 3 questions is a resounding NO!! Yet you believe it and because your future groom/bride needs money for some financial emergency, you send him/her your debit card number!! CHA-CHING!!! Sadly, many people fall prey to this kind of scam. I know they do because of the number of times I'm approached by scammers online. There is only ONE reason that they do it.....IT WORKS!!! 

Group Two: 

You're in a long term relationship. The demands of raising 4 kids, the pressure of working a job, and living within a household budget are combining to take a toll upon you. When you look across the room at your partner, the " god I love you" that you once heard in your head has been replaced by " what the hell was I thinking?" Your life mate has become a life sentence, your soul mate a cell mate. So here you are at an internet website, where you find " the one." The ying to your yang, the peas to your carrots. Does it really matter that this person has been divorced 4 times, has a substance abuse problem, and the two longest, successful relationships said individual has had were with a bail bondsman and a parole officer? 

Yet we delude ourselves online, we often see a poor option at best or the fatally flawed choice at worst as perfect. Especially when we are new to the internet experience, before we gain online savvy. A popular online dating site proclaims that 1 in 5 relationships now begin at an internet dating site. I believe that and I also think that these numbers will increase as we move into the future. The key element is that the overwhelming majority who join internet dating sites our matched with LOCAL people! Staying within one's area allows one to date and get to know another. In my opinion, staying local gives one a chance to be more successful. 

We've all heard a story of a successful, long distance internet relationship. Some of us may have knowledge of several happy couples who were able to overcome the distance obstacle. While these stories give hope to every romantic who is involved in such a relationship and every person who has worn out 4 DVDs of Sleepless In Seattle, the reality is that 100s more fail. The summer romance element of these affairs often prevents couples from having the ability to come to grips with the 800 pound gorilla in the room. Very few if any aspects of the romance are based in reality. In fact, many fail to consider the "big obvious." Eventually one or both parties must move. That's why it is almost always best to pursue local, real time options. Otherwise, I believe many of us are just chasing windmills...Peace to all...John : ) 

No comments:

Post a Comment